It's that time of year for parties and get-togethers, meeting new people and old friends. And if you're anything like me, you can pretend to be the biggest extrovert of them all - but inside you're peeing your pants trying to keep up this brave facade.
I've discovered a new little trick for meeting new people, esepcially those I admire or find intimidating (which is everyone I've never met before). It's kind of a weird little trick and especially gross, but it helps me normalize the world and see other people down on my level.
I imagine them sitting on the toilet taking the biggest, messiest dump of their lives.
Nasty, I know. Too personal, I know. But if you imagine these people you fear or admire having a bad case of the runs, it somehow helps you to empathize with them and find some common ground. We've all been there, attached to the toilet seat, praying for mercy from the poop g-ds.
It's kind of like the age-old "imagine them in their underwear" trick, except sometimes that can back fire, I've found. When I'm meeting this gorgeous person and I imagine them in their underwear, I start to feel infinitely worse about myself. I start to imagine myself in my underwear standing beside them, tears rolling down their faces as they mock my lumps and rolls and four-year-old granny panties next to their rock-hard abs and VS lacy bits. Not exactly a confidence booster.
But if I imagine them crapping their guts out, it somehow levels the playing field...in my mind, at least.
So there you have it - the best holiday advice I can give you when meeting new faces in new places. Just imagine everyone sitting on the toilet taking giant dumps. It'll make the entire process so much more enjoyable!!
I've discovered a new little trick for meeting new people, esepcially those I admire or find intimidating (which is everyone I've never met before). It's kind of a weird little trick and especially gross, but it helps me normalize the world and see other people down on my level.
I imagine them sitting on the toilet taking the biggest, messiest dump of their lives.
Nasty, I know. Too personal, I know. But if you imagine these people you fear or admire having a bad case of the runs, it somehow helps you to empathize with them and find some common ground. We've all been there, attached to the toilet seat, praying for mercy from the poop g-ds.
It's kind of like the age-old "imagine them in their underwear" trick, except sometimes that can back fire, I've found. When I'm meeting this gorgeous person and I imagine them in their underwear, I start to feel infinitely worse about myself. I start to imagine myself in my underwear standing beside them, tears rolling down their faces as they mock my lumps and rolls and four-year-old granny panties next to their rock-hard abs and VS lacy bits. Not exactly a confidence booster.
But if I imagine them crapping their guts out, it somehow levels the playing field...in my mind, at least.
So there you have it - the best holiday advice I can give you when meeting new faces in new places. Just imagine everyone sitting on the toilet taking giant dumps. It'll make the entire process so much more enjoyable!!
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