honorable mention: Q&A style

Today I am very lucky to have Maria of http://www.mommymelee.com/ (@MariaMelee) on my blog, answering some of my burning questions.

Maria has the kind of blog I admire - she's open and honest, her words are always very fluid and concise. There have been many times I've read her posts and thought to myself "why didn't I think of that?" - she has a way of opening your eyes to new and different things, all the while being very humble and a loyal blog and twitter (and I imagine in real life, as well) friend.

I hope you find this Q&A as informative and enjoyable as I did; it's always nice to pin down a good blogger and pick their brain!


First off, how do you do it?! You have your blog, your review blog and you write for AimingLow and Girl Talk Thursday, among others. How do you find balance in writing and reviewing and picture-taking and editing? How do you keep yourself focused on your daily tasks?

Actually, I completely suck at managing my time. I need a personal assistant to smack me in the back of the head when I’m spending too much time on Twitter or in my feed reader. I try to spend no more than a few hours a week on my review blog since it isn’t currently profitable in any way. My personal blog is my emotional and creative outlet. I blog when I feel like it and usually post right away. I have deadlines to meet with Aiming Low so I consider that part of my work writing, which is what I spend most of my work time doing.

Many people don’t know that I work pretty much full time freelancing. I write web content for IdeaLaunch.com and a handful of small business clients. I also edit web and print content, direct social media strategies for small businesses, and design graphics for blogs. Focus is a constant struggle for me. I’m fortunate to have childcare. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be able to balance my work time with my creative time.

Pictures? I usually work with photography (as a hobby) in the evening hours after the kids are sleeping and if I don’t have Project Runway to watch. Heh. I’d love to become a better photographer but the hobby is very time consuming and expensive. It’s a long term goal.

You've been on blogger since 2007 - what made you decide to start a blog?

I’ve actually been blogging since the fall of 2001! My previous blog was password protected. I decided to start a public blog when I left a corporate digital media job to start freelancing (and spending more time with my kids.) I needed a way to connect and I thought it would be a way to make money. (Boy was I wrong!) While blogging hasn’t been a source of income, it’s been a source of sanity and friendship. My blog is my voice.

In this day and age, public information is everywhere. It's available 24/7 for the world to see. Why is it important to you to keep your children's names secret? How do you decide what's private and what's public?

I promised my mom I wouldn’t use my kid’s names online. Since they’re little, they can’t tell me whether or not they want to be written about on the Internet. When they’re old enough to decide, they’re welcome to tell me to use their names online. Until then, I feel like I owe them the ability to not show up in a Google search.

At Mom 2.0, one of the panelists described the balance perfectly to me. To paraphrase, I share what is vulnerable for me to talk about, but I don’t share what is intimate in my life. I don’t blog about others unless I know they’d be okay with it.

Speaking of private things, do you think it's possible for a person to regain a certain level of anonymity after sharing public things on the internet? Some people put themselves out there 100% naively and then regret their decisions. What's the best way people can stop sharing so much about themselves online in order to keep their privacy?

I don’t really have advice here. It’s extremely hard to be private on the Internet. Unless you never post any pictures and you use completely fake names, people will be able to find out who you are. My only real suggestion is that you fork up the money to keep your “whois” info private. (This only applies if you have your own domain.)

Some people are absolutely okay with putting it all out there. I don’t think that’s naïve. It’s absolutely a matter of personal preference.

What are three blogging tips you've learned over the past few years that have really helped you become a better and happier blogger?

Write. Just open up a word processor and write. Don’t plan ahead.

Read. If you’re not reading your peers, you will not grow as a writer and you won’t grow in the community.

Value yourself. This goes for your time, your words, and your influence. I don’t care if you have five readers. Your words are valuable—don’t compromise your authenticity for a couple of lattes.

What made you decide to start reviewing products? Did you approach the subject or were you approached by other companies? What makes Your Mama Reviews stand out from your run of the mill mommy-blog reviews?

I think I started out of boredom and interest in getting free stuff. I know! I’m such a dick. But it’s true. We really had no idea what we were doing. Actually, I learned so much about the blogosphere by starting a review blog without researching first. It opened my eyes to the sorts of blogs I really take issue with. It gave me a lot of respect for those who are successful and engaging.

I think we stand out because we focus heavily on the quality of our writing. We really spend time with the products we review, and we try to be a little humorous. I wouldn’t necessarily recommend this approach since it takes forever and we’re not making any money.

What draws you to the blogs you follow and the people you friend on Twitter? Are there any online characteristics some people have that really turn you off?

I’m just drawn to a natural sense of connection. I love honesty, clever writing, humor, talent. I’m often drawn to moms of boys because that’s what I’m knee deep in. I’m turned off by bigotry, extreme conservatism and consistently mean behavior. And bullying.

What are your goals for your blog? Do you want to see yourself maintaining at the level you're at or would you like to see your blog reach higher?

I don’t really have goals. Like most bloggers, I love feedback. I hate writing in a vacuum. Comments are way more important to me than traffic and income. Ultimately, if I’m recognized as a writer I’m very happy. If I’m recognized as a good writer I’m pretty much over the moon.

If you had to give one piece of advice to someone just starting out with a blog, what would you say to them? What do you wish someone would've told you when you were first starting out?

Spend some time choosing your blog name/identity. I picked mine as a whim and I really hate it. Keep your design fairly clean. Don’t invest a ton of money when you get started—just invest time and write, write, write.